"Living this double life is killing me...see, am married, with three kids. And every evening before heading home I have to pass by my boyfriend's place.
"Seeing him open the door for me, sitting as he narrates his daily activities, looking at his hands as he gestures excitedly....I feel totally at home
"But two hours later, I have to head to my wife. Listen to her endless chatter about her church programs, how they are planning to buy a new piano...it chokes me
"But I have to swallow it all. Its part of my double life. No running away from it now. I shudder to think what would happen if she knew. And spread the news to her church members. My work colleagues. Family, friends
"The closet looks safe, for now. But am burning inside. A part of me wants to scream and just go to Steve's place. Look at his hands the whole night. Listen as he laughs his crazy laughter. Oooh God, I miss him so much
"This is slow death. Slow, but sure. Am just hoping one day I will be brave enough to make a choice. To just walk away from her.
"Never look back...."